The Money Couple Minute - Is There Life After Foreclosure? 4 Steps to Reovery
We are meeting with lots of couples in this situation and seeing the stress this huge upheaval can cause in a relationship. If you're losing your home, here's how to pick up the pieces and move forward.
- Grieve the loss. This is a real, painful change. Houses are not just shelter, they are home, places we raise families and make memories. One of you might take this loss harder than the other, so be sensitive to the emotional heft of foreclosure.
- Avoid the blame game. We see couples move straight from sadness to anger and blame. They accuse each other of pushing for a house they couldn't afford, for not working hard enough to keep it, for never taking the other's concerns seriously. Even if those things are true, harping on them now won't help. Instead, decide right now that you are going to start over, together.
- Decide how public you want to make this news. Talk about who needs to know and what you're going to tell them. Decide what you want to say to your kids, your parents, your best friends. Make these decisions together and stick with them. Respect your partner enough to protect his or her privacy and feelings.
- Take some time off. It's tempting to want to jump right back in to home ownership or to rework your whole financial picture. But we tell couples to give themselves some time - six months or even a year - to recover from the loss and regroup. If that means you rent for a year, then rent for a year. Don't worry about what other people think. Work as a team and do what is best for you and your family.
Foreclosure can be a huge set back, but it's not the end for you. You can have a solid financial future even when you've had a bumpy past.
