The Money Couple Minute:
Your Money Personality: The Flyer

Every person has a distinct way of thinking about and dealing with money.  And in a relationship, those distinctions can be the difference between being on the same page about financial issues and having money be a constant source of conflict.  After all isn’t there a money component to just about every decision we make as a couple?  That’s why when couples ask us how they can stop fighting about money, the first things we tell them is to figure out their Money Personalities.

Over the next few Money Couple Minutes, we’ll dig in to each of the five Money Personalities we identify in our book, First Comes Love, Then Comes Money: the Saver, the Spender, the Risk Taker, the Security Seeker, and the Flyer.  We have learned that each person has two of the five Money Personalities, a Primary and a Secondary.  So keep that in mind as you identify what you and your partner are.

As you learn more about your Money Personalities, you’ll gain invaluable insight into the ways you and your spouse handle finances and find ways to stop fighting and start working together.

This week, we focus on the Flyer.

The Flyer is perhaps the most unusual money personality in that it has very little to do with money.  Flyers don’t think about money - at all.  They’re not anxious about it, they’re not consumed by it, they have absolutely no emotional response to money.  You’re a Flyer if you are:

• Basically content with your life.  A Flyer might be dirt poor and living in an Airstream out by the highway but he doesn’t care.  As long as a Flyer is making his own choices, he’s happy.
• Big on relationships.  For Flyers, relationships and connections with other people are crucial.  Flyers will often put relationships above a financial task.
• Happy to let someone else take care of your finances.  This can be a big plus in relationships, especially if the other partner has one of the other money personalities.
• Not motivated by money.  Most Flyers end up living exactly the lives they want to live because they make choices based on what they want, not what will make them the most money.

This money personality has its challenges just like the others.  If you’re not a Flyer, you can probably guess what they are because just reading about the Flyer has made you nervous.  If you’re a Flyer you need to be aware that you can be:

• Reactionary.  Flyers don’t think about money, but money is a necessary part of life.  So sooner or later, even Flyers have to pay attention to their bills or their looming retirement.  And when they do, they often make financial decisions based on fear, not good advice.  That lack of planning can lead them into deep debt, debt they pass on to their partners.
• Lacking in the skills needed to solve your financial problems.  When money problems come up, the Flyer tries to handle it herself.  But because she doesn’t care about money, she doesn’t have any idea how finances work.  Interest? Consolidation? Refinancing? These concepts aren’t on her radar.
• Disorganized.  Flyers aren’t always disorganized people in the general sense, but when it comes to money, they are all over the place.  We’ve asked Flyers to bring in tax returns and they have no idea where something like that might be.  Some of them don’t even remember if they filed taxes or what their taxable income is.
• Un-responsible.  Anyone who isn’t a Flyer might think Flyer’s are irresponsible.  But really, they are un-responsible.  Irresponsibility suggests a deliberate lack of maturity.  But Flyers aren’t trying to be lazy or inattentive.  They genuinely don’t think about money issues.

Make It Happen!

Scott and Bethany Palmer
The Money Couple

Money Huddle Tip:  If one of you is a Flyer, take some time to talk about the impact this Money Personality has on your relationship.  What are the strengths the Flyer brings?  What are some of the challenges?

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