The Money Couple Minute:
Your Money Personality: The Security Seeker

Every person has a distinct way of thinking about and dealing with money.  And in a relationship, those distinctions can be the difference between being on the same page about financial issues and having money be a constant source of conflict.  After all isn’t there a money component to just about every decision we make as a couple?  That’s why when couples ask us how they can stop fighting about money, the first things we tell them is to figure out their Money Personalities.

Over the next few Money Couple Minutes, we’ll dig in to each of the five Money Personalities we identify in our book, First Comes Love, Then Comes Money: the Saver, the Spender, the Risk Taker, the Security Seeker, and the Flyer.  We have learned that each person has two of the five Money Personalities, a Primary and a Secondary.  So keep that in mind as you identify what you and your partner are.

As you learn more about your Money Personalities, you’ll gain invaluable insight into the ways you and your spouse handle finances and find ways to stop fighting and start working together.

This week, we focus on the Security Seeker.

Security Seekers like to know the financial future is settled and safe.  They are all about low-risk investments, hefty life and property insurance, and secure retirement funds.  When it comes to money, the Security Seeker’s motto is, “The safer, the better.”  You’re a Security Seeker if you are:

• An investigator.  A Security Seeker would never invest in a piece of property he’d never seen.  In fact, a Security Seeker wouldn’t just need to see the property, he’d need to have the soil tested for toxicity, look into all the zoning restrictions within a three-mile area, and get a detailed prospectus from the developer and a resume from every other investor.
• Trustworthy.  Security Seekers rarely put their futures on the line.  That means they aren’t likely to gamble away their retirement or tap into the college fund to join a multi-level marketing company.
• Willing to sacrifice.  A Security Seeker would rather do without today than do without tomorrow.  They won’t spend money until they know they’ve put away a little for retirement, life insurance, and any other investments they’ve set up to make sure the future is taken care of.
• Prepared for anything.  Security Seekers are never caught without a plan.  The Security Seeker rarely ends up in a financial crisis (at least not a real crisis - that 5% stock market dip can feel like a crisis to the Security Seeker), which means the rest of the family can rest a little easier.

The Security Seeker does have some challenges.  If you’re a Security Seeker, you need to be aware that you can:

• Be overly negative.  Security Seekers get nervous about financial risk, so they often say “no” to every idea that comes along.  The Security Seeker can become controlling, using his veto power to keep his partner from exploring her own financial dreams.
• Get stuck in a research rut.  We call this tendency “paralysis by analysis.”  In other words, Security Seekers can get so caught up in making sure an opportunity is foolproof that they never act.
• Stifle creativity.  This challenge doesn’t just impact other people in the Security Seeker’s life, it impacts the Security Seeker, too.  Over time, that need for security can become so all-consuming that she stops looking at the possibilities of the future and sticks with the certainties - and that can be a very subtle form of control.

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